Simpleminded

بِسْمِ اللهِ الرَّحْمنِ الرَّحِيمِ

Taman Tasik Titiwangsa, 2016

This semester has been a slow start for my brain. I don't know why but I believe I must have done something wrong, or maybe I started getting further from Allah. Nauzubillah.

My last midterm exam was on last Friday and I ruined everything. I couldn't answer properly. Dia punya level takleh jawab yang sampai confirm failed punya. I mean it. Lepas exam tu rasa nak menangis je, tapi bila fikir balik tak nak balik bilik layan perasaan sebab takut aku buat benda bukan-bukan. But I cried when dad called me and asked about the exam. Lepas solat pun nangis.Peritnya tahan nangis weh.

Sedih bila orang cakap "Sembang ah, padahal markah tinggi jugak." This is the very reason why I don't want to talk to people about my worries - because not all of them can't help. People don't want to hear sad stories, they really don't. Who cares about your problems when they have theirs?

Tak tahu apa masalah aku dengan subjek ni tapi memang sampai ke sudah tak boleh nak paham konsep. I thought I do, but bila jawab soalan, as if macam tak pernah belajar. Even subjek accounting pun aku asyik lost je dalam kelas. Hmm rasa macam akal dah terhijab nak terima ilmu. Nauzubillah jauhkanlah.

It feels awful to be stupid.

(Thanks to google, found a word to describe stupid in a nicer way - simpleminded)

Comments